see those splotches? you probably think their bruises. they're not. it's a really weird and rare form my skin heals itself. Wherever i've had bruises or impact injuries before, these weird skin splotches come up a couple months/years later. I went to the doctor previously for them, and they gave me a cream for it. they were getting better until i was told i was over-using them and it actually made my skin super thin. which made them more obvious. [they're also on my hand. and ankle.]
it's spring time. which means skirts and shorts weather. i was told by some people that they werent noticeable until i pointed them out. But one day, i think about 8 people noticed. "are those bruises!?" i know theyre innocent questions, but they hurt. i'm super insecure about this, and when people point out my insecurites its just a reminder of how imperfect i am.
I will always find something i don't like about myself. and i think in that attitude, im not alone (unfortunately)
Last night (when this picture was taken) i was in the shower. i was looking down at my legs. and i started crying. and whenever i think of one negative thing about myself, the rest of them come up in my mind. it was a harsh, personal moment of tough reflection.
i've decided i should stop thinking about myself in a bad way. you might be thinking "why would she do that!? she has lots to fix...." well everybody does. everybody has imperfections and reasons for others to critique them in a negative way. but i believe that if i start thinking more positively about others, i'll think more positively about myself. i am stuck with who i am. i will always be short. i will always have curly hair. i will always have brown eyes. i will always be me. and it's time to accept that.
and to celebrate me.
no matter how imperfect, cranky, splotchy {and on and on} i am.
because i'm stuck with this forever.
and it's okay.
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