thoughts with this rainy day

The most beautiful sea hasn't been crossed yet.
The most beautiful child hasn't grown up yet.
The most beautiful days we haven't seen yet.
And the most beautiful words I wanted to tell you...
I haven't said yet.

-Nazim Hikmet

portrayed

Your life is portrayed by those all other than yourself. They view your actions and words, without knowing your thoughts. You may act a certain way that contradicts your intent or thoughts, but others dont see that. They see and assume what you think is what you do.

I cant just side with one side saying that you should always give people the benefit of the doubt. Although that is true you cant let people just toss you around. Stand your ground. If someone is using you and treating you unfairly, dont just let it happen. Approach it in the right way. Even though the heat of the moment definitely makes it difficult to act calmly. There have been times where the only way id know id make an impact to cause change was by acting very feircly.

1. be fair
2. dont always think of yourself
3. be open minded
4. try to approach situations in a appropriate manner
5. stand up for yourself
6. stay to your beliefs no matter what.

never let others use you,
but dont ever ruin a good relationship.



j.

feeling beefy

The unbudging grudge.
If i think about my past, many unforgivable instances have happened.
Things that bring up anger, selft doubt, confusion and even hatred.
Its hard to let go of things that people have done that offend you.
Its easy to justify why you dont need to ever forgive. but you do.
Forgive.
You never know someones true intent for doing what they did.
You never know what they have been through or experienced to get them at that point.
You never know how badly you couldve hurt someone even if it didnt seem that bad to you.
Change your perspective. and forgive.
give them the benefit of the doubt and start over.

It wont be easy. It has taken me about two years to get over something that was completely ridiculous.
At many times i feel like the person hasnt deserved their justice.
But they will. leave that out of your hands.
even if their life is easier than yours in the long run, the experience may have benefitted you over time in a way you cant even realized.
it many have made you stronger, tougher and more experienced to handle the harshness of the world.
although it may be unfair, frustrating, ridiculous, forgive.
the person still hasnt apologized and maybe its because they havent realized what they did.
the day, if it ever happens, that they forgive will be amazing closure.
and a huge burden for possibly both will be lifted.

if you have done something to someone, you think about it often but believe theyve gotten over it, it doesnt matter.
apologize to them. maybe you dont have to say anything, but show in your actions.
if you think about it, youd want someone to apologized for something they did to you,
so apologize to someone you need to.
even if its difficult.

for now, ill pretend that everythings okay and it never happened.
i've frogiven them and thats all i can do.
I cant force them to do anything at all.
do your part and forgive and apologize.

life is too short to waste any human relationships.

any.



j

the place in my mind

There is a place in my mind where the dead ones go.

my friends, family members, famous people and acquaintances.

mingling forever and backing me up.

standing there for me when i'm alone at night.

that solid foundation when nobody understands.

my grandma.

my friend's little brother

the victims of genocides

my favorite actor

that car crash victim

the unknown soldier

the cousins i never met

that one stranger nobody knew

all of them in the same place.

the perfect place.

waiting for me patiently till im home again.

smiling. loving. surrounding. encouraging. cheering

wanting nothing but the best because they finally landed in the place of perfection.

the place where it all makes sense.

and they knew that they're lives were worth it.

and they know that my life is worth it. yours is too.

they never want to be forgotten, but never want to be mourned.

they've learned that the little things matter.

and that others are above everything.

and that every life is perfect and purposeful.

no matter how long it lasts.

and because of that expiring time,

every moment counts.

every smile. every person to show love to.

every thought in your head.

every decision made.

because every life has magnificent purpose. especially yours.

live for them and live for yourself.

live for the moment and live for the end.

j.