I found out at the doctor's yesterday that i have anxiety. and its bad. and i dont like it. and it came about at such a rough and critical time.I created this blog to be completely honest [almost] about my life. yesterday i typed how i felt up on my phone whilst i was in the incredibly unfriendly 'exam room'.
"i have no person to vent to. no outlet. no refuge. i currently live in a world of go go go and nothings ever finished before the next thing comes. every day is a bad day. every day i wake up sick and every night i cant sleep. i feel no purpose. no one ever reassures me anything. if i ever come to what feels like the end, its never good enough. there is no praise for any good deed."
just remember that at the time i was really emotionally beat down and incredibly exhausted. my attitude today is almost incredibly different.
itll get better. life will get calmer. and good things will come.
i have a lot to look forward to. even though itll come about almost for certainly chaotically.
much love,
j.
Ugh. Sorry to hear that, Jeanette. I have a feeling that addressing the anxiety will address some of the other feelings you had at the doctor's office. Blessings your way in working out a good solution.
ReplyDeleteIn lighter news, that photo of the weather is brilliant!
Jeanette, guess what? I think it's genetic. I have anxiety too and the medication I am on helps me so much. It makes me sad that I felt so awful for so long and did nothing about it. You will be just fine. I promise. It's just another one of life's curve balls, but you will move past it. You may never get over it, but you'll feel like you again. I promise. Just take your pills... :) Love you!
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